random thaughts

Saturday, October 11, 2003

I am feeling great today. Good energy, clear head.
I realized today how much I miss the old days.
People always talk about the best days/times of your life. Ya know how long it has been since I have had one of those. I can’t remember, and it is depressing. I need to do something different with my life. It is just too stagnant. I have recently been in contact with many of my college friends, and none of us are doing what we went to college for. That gets to me deep down inside. I need to change that. I love to bee in the outdoors. I moved to Austin and the outdoors no longer exists. I need to do something to get back. And I don’t think that Austin holds anything for me. I love the few friends that I have here, and would do anything for them, but there is nothing here for me. I am going to start to look for other things. I need a change before I go insane. I have just realized that one of the two things that were the most important to me is no longer there, and I am dying with out it. I miss the water. I miss the adventure, and the life that comes with it. I hate my job. The only thing that keeps me there is the Tukong class that I am now teaching. Which is the other thing that is important to me (besides Karen, she is the most important). I can’t stand being stuck inside all day. I need to be put side, where the air is good for you and where it is healthy to be out side. And that is not Austin.

I Just don't know anymore.

Tuesday, October 07, 2003

I feel like poo. Not the bear, but the other type of poo.I've got a cold, and it sucks. But I think that i will live. You never realize how crappy things can be untill you are sick and alone. When someone is her, it is ok. They make you tea, and chicken noodle soup. And they tell you you will be better soon. But when you are alone, it sucks. Its just you. and right now it's just me. I have been coughing constantly for two days. And I think that i have pulled or strained almost all of the mouscles in my back.

I have now missed two days of training. I have also missed one day of work, and have had to cancel one of my tukong classes. I only have these kids for so long, and it kills me to have to take one of there classes away. But i could not have made it through work today. So i hope that the rest of the week of training goes well, and i can teach them lots. I love working with almost all of these kids. They are great. They put a smile on my face, most of the time.

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